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So, uh, how am I doing lately? I really don't know. Parts of me… - Chronicles of a Hereditary Geek [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Darth Paradox

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[Sep. 10th, 2005|12:11 am]
Darth Paradox
[Tags|, , ]
[mood |indescribableindescribable]
[music |Les Miserables - The ABC Cafe - Red and Black]

So, uh, how am I doing lately?

I really don't know.

Parts of me have been dealing with this low-level loneliness/depression for most of the week. Dreams, things reminding me of Shelly, all together it's not been a good situation for me. Generally, I remind myself of why we aren't together anymore, and things get a little better, but it doesn't change the fact that I'm still pretty lonely on a day-to-day basis. Even with the cons I've been to lately.

Other times, I'm giddily happy. Today I was walking home from the bus, and I just started laughing. No reason whatsoever - everything just felt good. And so I laughed.

Most of the time at work - at least this week - I've just been straight busy. This week, during the days, I was handling part of the on-call duty for the team, in training to do it myself when my turn in the rotation came up. Accordingly, I got very little of my other work done. That's the way on-call duty goes - you put the rest of your life on hold for two weeks, and take one for the team. Gah.

So, at the moment, where am I? How am I? Well, slightly drunk, to start. Takes the edge off things? I dunno, but it's Friday, and I fucking deserve it. I've just watched four episodes of FMA, so I've finished through ep 20 now. Damn good show. I'm contemplating Scatterplot, though I know I'll work on it tomorrow, because I'm damn tired and thinking about going to bed right now.

Today on the bus I finished Down and Out in the Magic Kingdom by Cory Doctorow. Pretty good book... stereotypical modern whimsical science fiction, I think. It certainly wasn't "hard" SF, but it was a fun read. Here at home, I finished Count of Monte Cristo as well as two of the "Girl Genius" collections before turning, finally, to "Watchmen". Been meaning to read this one for a loooong time, and I'm extremely satisfied with it so far, three issues in. It's the most human superhero story I've ever seen.
Recent book completions also include Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep? (aka Blade Runner) and the entirety of Kim Stanley Robinson's Mars trilogy. The latter is one of the best works of hard SF I've ever read, and I would recommend it highly to anyone who appreciates the genre.

So, tomorrow: Scatterplot, unpacking (finally/again!), and possibly a poker game. Sunday: more of the same, sans poker. I hope to be a comic ahead and significantly more unpacked by the time I go back to work on Monday.

Sweet dreams, friends. Life's too short for sleep, but we have to do it anyway...
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Comments:
[User Picture]From: annaonthemoon
2005-09-10 02:56 pm (UTC)
*hugs*
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[User Picture]From: mizufae
2005-09-10 03:00 pm (UTC)
after you read watchmen, be sure to read Top Ten (it's only two trade paperbacks) and then read its sequel: Smax. Smax is hilarious and well written and fabulicious. I also consider top ten to be my favorite Alan Moore anything, if that counts for something in your book.

ps: you should get a kitty. they help.
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[User Picture]From: darthparadox
2005-09-10 05:33 pm (UTC)
Well, I'm quite impressed with Alan Moore so far. So I'll look into getting those...

As for a kitty... well, I'm going to get one. I made sure to get an apartment that permitted them. However, that can't really happen until I'm done unpacking...
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From: dacut
2005-09-10 06:50 pm (UTC)
Heh... if you need some temporary cat therapy, stop by my place. I have two here, and they love all the attention they can get.

We're currently watching the U.S. Open men's semis right now... Agassi v. Ginepri. Lazy Saturday in Seattle...
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[User Picture]From: darthparadox
2005-09-10 07:43 pm (UTC)
Yeah, I just finished watching some college football. Gah.

I can't deal with a lazy Saturday at the moment, though - got a comic and some unpacking to do...
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From: ex_miang438
2005-09-10 03:16 pm (UTC)
*hugs* I can't really give you any advice (not that you were specifically looking for any), because that kind of thing just happens sometimes, but I hope it passes soon. American society kinda sucks that way. But taking joy in your surroundings is one of the best ways out, and it sounds like you have that well in hand.

Hooray for FMA! Episode 20, huh...we should talk after you get through another five. ^_- And oh dear lord I love Les Mis but THAT SONG WILL BE IN MY HEAD ALL DAY NOW THANK YOU VERY MUCH. *cough* *falls over*
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[User Picture]From: darthparadox
2005-09-10 05:30 pm (UTC)
You think that's bad... I get stuck thinking about red-black binary trees every time I hear it.

Oy.
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[User Picture]From: greenstorm
2005-09-11 05:36 am (UTC)
Ahh, that rollercoastery feeling kinda sucks. I find that something distracting/engrossing is the way out of it.

Loneliness sucks too, but of course you know being in a relationship with someone just 'cause loneliness sucks tends to be worse.

Take care of yourself.
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[User Picture]From: darthparadox
2005-09-11 06:30 am (UTC)
Well, no. I'm not looking to jump into a relationship on that basis - I know better than that. Casual sex with random people is a little better, but comes with its own problems - not to mention the fact that I really just don't work that way.

But I spent the last five hours with people from work, and just hanging out with people is making me feel better already.
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[User Picture]From: chanilye
2005-09-12 01:34 pm (UTC)
*hugs*

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